So yeah...im a fail im such a loser weak ass fat PIG. I FAILED to you guys, and to ana and myself.
I did my punishments and it has been like hell,ive been purging and i had my throat really soar.I found this friend that also has an ED shes apparently binging disorder developing mia but she asked me to help her, i cant see her personally but we are always communicate by the phone, cuz she lives way far from me.we decided we were both going to commit to this. no MORE BINGE we have to be really strong, besides i think my sister is getting kind off suspicious so i have to stop this i cant let mia win, i cant let ana down.Leaving that aside today so far ive only had 1 diet coke, lettuce(20cals or so) and some ham and meat(150) and an accidental spoon of rice(100 cals or so) i know i kinda messed up a little bit but im not having anythiing else for today and i took 2 lax know to see if i can get all this out as soon as possible, and be ready to start the abc tomorrow (:
My friend and i are doing it together, and i was even thinking that why is it that i have to binge i mean food is always going to be there i dont need it for know, when i can only see bones maybe ill consider it but right now all there is is FAT so i guess food can wait.
This has been like the worst week of my life, even my birthday went so shitty, i ended up even cutting and crying, the worst birthday ever.But i know next one is not going to be like this, cause i am completing me goal and i am going to be all bones. know i have to loose alot of weight before i get in schooll so i have about 2 weeks to loose everything i can. wish me luck (:
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